Cooking meals. Managing medications. Getting your loved ones to doctor appointments.
If you’re a caregiver, you know how stressful the demands on your time and attention can be. Sometimes, they can be overwhelming, and if you’re not careful, they can lead to burnout.
About 1 in 3 adults in the U.S. are estimated to be an informal or family caregiver, and studies show that more than 60% of them experience burnout. What is caregiver burnout, and how is it different from regular stress?
Learn to spot the signs of caregiver burnout and stop it before it starts.
What Is Caregiver Burnout?
It’s the emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion that happens when the constant demands of caregiving overwhelm you. It can affect your mental, physical, and emotional health. And if it’s not addressed, it can negatively affect the person you’re caring for.
What Causes Caregiver Burnout?
The most common cause of burnout is failing to manage stress before it overwhelms you. Some of the things that can cause stress and lead to burnout for caregivers include:
Role confusion. How do you shift — often, with little or no warning — from being a spouse, child, or parent to a full-time caregiver? This shift can create stress and confusion for everyone involved.
Unrealistic expectations. You may want to believe that with enough time, care, and attention, you can help your loved one get better. That’s not always the case, especially if they have a progressive or terminal disease. It may take time to accept what you can and can’t do as a caregiver.
Lack of control. It takes time, money, and resources to be a caregiver, and having limited to no control over any of these things can trigger stress and ultimately, burnout.
Too many responsibilities. Household chores, managing finances, and making doctors’ appointments are just a few of your many tasks as a caregiver. Being responsible for handling all of these responsibilities, often with little or no help, can lead to stress and burnout.
Is it burnout or normal stress?
Stress and burnout are not the same. Stress is a natural response to a challenge or situation that causes us to worry. Even though we feel pressure, we have the energy to press through. Stress typically goes away when the challenge does.
Burnout is emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion that happens when we don’t manage stress. When we’re burnt out, we don’t have anything else to give. We may feel detached, disillusioned, and helpless to change our situation. What’s more, burnout can affect your physical, mental, and emotional health. According to the American Medical Association, a caregiver experiencing burnout can become less empathetic and more impatient and argumentative with the person they’re caring for. Feelings of burnout can even lead to depression.
Signs You’re Headed for Caregiver Burnout
The easiest way to avoid caregiver burnout is to recognize the warning signs. If you’re experiencing any of these symptoms, you may be approaching that stage. Note: This is not a medical diagnosis. Talk to your doctor about any of these changes that concern you.
Physical
- I get sick more often and regularly have aches and pains.
- I’m tired and drained all the time, no matter how much sleep I get.
- I’m always on edge and can feel the tension in my neck and shoulders.
- I’m losing weight and don’t have much of an appetite.
Emotional/mental health
- I feel constantly overwhelmed by caregiving responsibilities.
- I’m angry and resentful about how much I’m expected to do.
- I feel hopeless and stuck, and can’t see my situation changing.
- I have trouble concentrating or remembering things.
Behavioral changes
- I’m anxious, frustrated, and irritable more than usual.
- I’m overeating, drinking more, or spending more time on social media to escape.
- I’m growing impatient and irritated with the person I’m caring for.
- I have no interest in being around people and don’t find joy in things I used to love.
If You’re Experiencing Caregiver Burnout
The way to avoid caregiver burnout is to spot the signs and manage your stress before it overwhelms you. But if you’re already feeling exhausted, try these things to get back on track:
Ask for help. Are there other people who can lend a hand — a friend, loved one, or neighbor? Ask them for help, and if they offer to help, let them. Make a list of tasks you need help with, and let them choose how to help.
Find local resources. Contact your local community or senior center to find free or affordable services, such as rideshare, meal delivery, or house cleaning.
Consider respite care. This is where a professional caregiver steps in for a certain period (a few hours or weeks) to give you much-needed time off. Check with your care receiver’s insurance plan to see if they cover respite care. You can find respite programs in your area through the ARCH National Respite Locator Service website.
Join a caregiver support group. A support group is a place where you can share your feelings and frustrations with others who understand what you’re going through. It’s also a place where you can grow, meet new friends, and get advice. Support groups meet in person or online. Check your local senior center, state office on aging, or faith community to find caregiver support groups in your area. You can also access 24/7 online support from other caregivers through the Caregiver Action Network website.
Seek social support. Make time, even if it’s brief, to meet with friends or connect with others. This might mean taking a class in your community or meeting a friend for coffee.
Talk to a mental health professional. Being a caregiver can be mentally and physically overwhelming. You might feel grief, anger, anxiety, or depression. A mental health counselor or therapist can help you process these feelings. If you feel like giving up or have thoughts of harming yourself or the person you’re caring for, get help right away. Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide Crisis Lifeline 24/7.
Make time for self-care. Caregiver burnout happens when you continually work to meet others’ needs but neglect your own. You’ll find that you feel better and have more energy if you make time for self-care. Here are some ways to get started:
- Do your best to eat good-for-you foods such as fruits and vegetables, lean meats, and whole grains.
- Get seven to nine hours of sleep each night.
- Try meditation or yoga to ease stress.
- Get active each day. Try gardening or walking, or take an exercise class.
- Keep your doctor’s appointments and take medications as directed.
- Take a break when you need it.
Taking these steps may be easier said than done, but once you do, you'll likely feel more balanced and better able to be the caregiver your loved one deserves.
