Who knew little colorful creatures known as pocket monsters, or Pokémon, would be part of Stepho Wilson’s saving grace? The love of her two-legged, four-legged, and stuffed buddies has turned her life around.
Loud House, Quiet Child
Wilson grew up a quiet child in a house full of five older siblings and parents from Puerto Rico and the Dominican Republic. “It was a very loud house, and I was an introvert,” says Wilson. “I was very sensitive and was raised by parents who brought their own trauma to parenting.”
With a military dad, the family moved a lot, and Wilson retreated into her own thoughts. “I first started feeling depressed as a teenager when all of my siblings had left home,” says Wilson. Without the tools to regulate her emotions and continuing to feel out of place, Wilson says she stuffed her feelings down until later, when they would emerge and demand attention.
Feeling Numb
After marrying her high school sweetheart and having her daughter, now 7, Wilson says her mental health challenges became more pronounced. Her plans for having a natural birth were dashed after being rushed to the hospital as the baby’s heart rate dropped. “After being in labor for over 25 hours, I delivered via C-section, and when they put her on me for skin-to-skin, I felt nothing,” she says. “That’s when I felt myself going into survival mode and really disconnecting from my emotions.”
While recovering at home, Wilson says she continued to go downhill. The things that previously brought her joy, like her dogs, video games, etc., did nothing. She felt numb. “Nothing brought me joy.”
After weeks of just going through the motions of being a new mom but neglecting herself, Wilson says she knew she needed help. She went to her OB/GYN, assuming she had postpartum depression. Her doctor put her on antidepressants, which helped for a while, and then the same issues came back. Now at a max dosage, it triggered a manic episode. “I decided not to go back to work as a vet assistant, and I just stayed in the house. I wasn’t sleeping, showering, or anything more than just the basics for my daughter,” she says. “The defense mechanisms I relied on my whole life weren’t working anymore. I couldn’t put the lid back on!”
Then, Wilson became impulsive, almost buying a new home that was out of the family budget and writing a children’s book out of the blue.
At her lowest, she had suicidal ideation. “At that point, I told my husband that I needed help,” says Wilson. She met with a psychiatrist who, unfortunately, misdiagnosed her manic episode as bipolar disorder. After trying treatment for that and it not working, Wilson was finally diagnosed with major depressive disorder (MDD).
“It was the first time I got good help from a provider who paid attention and noticed almost immediately that I showed signs of MDD,” says Wilson. “Then, when I noticed she had a therapy dog in her office that was a former patient of mine at the vet clinic, I knew it was a good sign!”
Posting and Pokémon
As Wilson improved with therapy and switched to ketamine infusions to help her depression, her willingness to engage and socialize increased. She started with video game streaming and then started posting about a passion of hers since childhood: her love of Pokémon. “I started collecting and trading when I was young, and it was a way I bonded with my older brother,” says Wilson. Her military dad would also bring characters home from his travels.
Now, Wilson has thousands of followers and attends events around the world. “When I first started this, I was not even leaving the house,” says Wilson. “Now, I’ve traveled to London by myself, have met some amazing people, and it’s all shown me that I’m stronger than I realized in creating content on social media.” She says it allowed her to regain part of her identity, especially as a new parent.
Still, Wilson says managing a large social media presence and regular posting with MDD (and now adult ADHD) calls for some planning. “I take breaks. I don’t post or respond to messages when I don’t have the energy, and I say no when I need to,” she says. Wilson also says being authentic about her mental health challenges is a focus, too. “I think it’s important not just to show the positive, bubbly, happy side that people like to show, but also the other side.”
A Dog Named Joy
Despite the good vibes that have come from her online content, her treatment plan, and enjoying hobbies, Wilson still felt like something was missing to help her manage her mental health and the outside world. So recently, she got a service dog named Joy. “She is trained for tasks specifically to help me with my depression and my anxiety,” says Wilson. “She is what they call a psychiatric service dog, which is only a term I discovered maybe about four years ago.”
Wilson says Joy helps with her confidence to go outside and not have to rely on her husband or daughter all the time. Joy provides comfort during her ketamine sessions (lying across her lap like a warm blanket. “She’s trained in nudge therapy and will nudge me if I’m getting anxious or feeling dysregulated.”
But one message Wilson has for the public who might be tempted to pet Joy or ask why she needs a service dog: “Most people love dogs and want to interact with them, but if I’m out with her, it’s probably because I’m not in the space to interact,” says Wilson. “I suggest people just ignore us and let Joy do her work. When she has her vest on, she’s working and very different from the 2-year old playful dog at home.” She hopes that more people will become educated about service dogs and the ways they can help that may not always be visible to others.
A New Day
While Wilson grows her online following, she hasn’t forgotten people who were once where she was — in deep depression and struggling to even manage simple hygiene. “I tell people that they should ask for help as soon as they notice something is wrong or different.” Building a strong support system is key, too. “Lean on your family, friends, partner, and medical providers,” she says. “Find people you can trust and who want to see you succeed.”
She says under no circumstances should you try to heal a deep hurt with a Band-Aid. “It will only get worse,” she says. Instead, Wilson says to lean into your hobbies and the things that make you happy or make you, you.
Wilson is doing just that as she plans some exciting travel this year with family and with her Pokemon passion. “I have a trip to Japan this spring I’m excited about,” she says. “I hope to catch the cherry blossoms!”
Wilson’s life is a true testimony of joy all around — you just have to look.
