“Important information for your doctor to know so that they can advise treatment changes are: what you're experiencing, how severe are any side effects that you're living with. Because if they are making your quality of life diminish, your doctor will use that information to determine whether or not it's worth it to continue you on a specific treatment.”

You probably have a lot of questions right now, and you may be anxious or nervous about what's to come. Since this is a new diagnosis, you might have a lot to learn about metastatic breast cancer.

In the early stages after getting a diagnosis, it can feel overwhelming. You may not remember everything. Ask your partner, a family member, or a friend to go to your appointment with you so you'll have an extra set of ears and a hand to hold. I like to have a notebook and pen in my purse so I can jot down notes. You can also use your phone's notes app.

Establish a clear relationship with your treatment team and advocate for yourself right from the start. Ask them questions. Find out why they're recommending a particular treatment. Don't be shy about wanting to try a treatment that isn't necessarily standard of care.

You'll leave with a lot of information and a follow-up appointment. Make sure you know when your next visit is scheduled. You may have so many appointments that it's hard to juggle them all. I immediately open the calendar in my phone and add them in there so I don't forget them.

Recap with your loved one.

It can help to have them there when you leave, to discuss what you both just heard and process it. As much as I'm used to going to appointments by myself after five years, it's extremely helpful to have someone there who asks their own questions. Even though this is happening to me – the patient – my loved ones are also deeply affected. They have their own fears and concerns.

Adjust your infusion schedule to you.

If you're getting infusions, you're usually going to be scheduling your life around them. Ask your team about taking breaks, because it's important to still live your life. I always refuse to get treatment on my birthday. I have full faith that it's not going to be the end of the world if I move around or skip a treatment to fit my life.

Practice self-care.

It's important to take good care of yourself after these appointments, especially in the beginning when they're so overwhelming. I know some people who give themselves a little treat afterward to bring some joy into the day.